Petty vs mature: what would you do?

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Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Philly » Fri Sep 02, 2016 3:44 am

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Well I have a slumlord that lied about having mold & tried to evict me when I complained about it. She claims that we brought the mold back & in the lease, utilities are included but now she's upset saying that we cost too much & she came in while I was at work and took the fans out of the kids rooms saying she can't afford it. She handwrote this ridiculous & illegal eviction letter in which she tried saying we had 24 hrs to vacate or she's trashing our stuff. I called a lawyer & she now understands she can't do that shit but she's been a total nightmare and I'm honestly thinking if she's gonna be a cunt then I might just pay tmrws rent in pennies. Like if you were in my shoes would ya just pay cash & let karma get her? Or do I say fuck her hand her a sack of pennies & say " hit the bank"
I really just wanna punch her, but with that being illegal/immoral plus I'm still looking for a new apt, I figure this is the most passive aggressive way I can stick it to her
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby ghostdogg » Fri Sep 02, 2016 9:24 am

I guess. In Canada, so much of what she did was illegal. You could sue or take her to the equivalent of the "landlord and tenant board".
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Corgimom » Fri Sep 02, 2016 2:28 pm

high road
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Philly » Fri Sep 02, 2016 6:41 pm

Ugh gonna pay in 20s but I'm still working with a lawyer to sue for all the bs. I shouldn't have to spend my money removing mold she knew she had
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Corgimom » Sat Sep 03, 2016 2:05 am

Yea I agree but to have a chance to sue you need to keep clean hands in the mess.
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Philly » Sat Sep 03, 2016 1:38 pm

You're right. Why is being mature so hard?
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby ink » Sat Sep 03, 2016 3:08 pm

doing the right thing is always tougher.. but in the end, it is always more rewarding than the impulsive, instant gratification that only lasts about as long as a fart in the wind.
we are, what we allow to occupy us..





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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Skywalker » Wed Sep 07, 2016 5:53 am

I know your pain. I am currently living in a place that also has a mold problem. The only good news is that another tenant also had the same issues in another home, and she called the health dept. Right now he is scared about not correcting issues. That might pass here soon.

Take the high road, it will only help down the road. Document everything, text messages, calls, visits and take pictures. I have pictures of all the mold that I have found, from the simple green stuff, to the thick black stuff that I found in the walk-in shower. That will only help your case.


Keep your spirits up, it can only go up from here :)
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Philly » Wed Sep 07, 2016 8:43 pm

Skywalker wrote:I know your pain. I am currently living in a place that also has a mold problem. The only good news is that another tenant also had the same issues in another home, and she called the health dept. Right now he is scared about not correcting issues. That might pass here soon.

Take the high road, it will only help down the road. Document everything, text messages, calls, visits and take pictures. I have pictures of all the mold that I have found, from the simple green stuff, to the thick black stuff that I found in the walk-in shower. That will only help your case.


Keep your spirits up, it can only go up from here :)



This apartment has been hell since day one and my kids dad left her stroller on the porch and some pos stole it so getting her around especially taking her on the bus everyday is gonna be hell. I can't wait for tax time using it on a new down payment while I continue job hunting. (Current job pays pennies) so I have long n short term goals but right now I'm pissed n feeling petty AF. Like I'm not dealing with enough right? Ugh! I'm rambling. Fucking slumlords
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Skywalker » Thu Sep 08, 2016 3:39 am

Damn. I wish I could help, but all the cash I have is about to go down on a good enough car at a buy-here-pay-here place. The cost of being poor is that my sister will have a high car payment a month, and a loan with the max, that the state of NC will allow.

It is alright to bitch, sometimes that is all ya got. If not, it feels like the weight of the world is on ya, and nothing is going right.

It is good that you have goals, I have my own. My mom as said to take it one step at a time. You can only do one thing at a time. It really does sound like you do have a plan. Many would fault you on waiting on your taxes, but truth is told, we are doing the same thing. Tax time and we are moving out of our current place.

As for the stroller, I know that you five to one are lacking on the aspect of cash, but maybe a place like the Salvation Army or Catholic Charities can help you out. There may be a place that new mothers go through to get baby clothes and other supplies, I remember my sister used one to get stuff for my nephew. She went back when he got a little bit bigger and they gave her larger clothes and a larger stroller. I really do wish I could help, I somewhat understand what a pain it is to carry a kid on the bus, as I seen my sister do it with her two kids and her husband (now ex-husband) refused to help her.
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Philly » Thu Sep 08, 2016 7:22 pm

Skywalker wrote:Damn. I wish I could help, but all the cash I have is about to go down on a good enough car at a buy-here-pay-here place. The cost of being poor is that my sister will have a high car payment a month, and a loan with the max, that the state of NC will allow.

It is alright to bitch, sometimes that is all ya got. If not, it feels like the weight of the world is on ya, and nothing is going right.

It is good that you have goals, I have my own. My mom as said to take it one step at a time. You can only do one thing at a time. It really does sound like you do have a plan. Many would fault you on waiting on your taxes, but truth is told, we are doing the same thing. Tax time and we are moving out of our current place.

As for the stroller, I know that you five to one are lacking on the aspect of cash, but maybe a place like the Salvation Army or Catholic Charities can help you out. There may be a place that new mothers go through to get baby clothes and other supplies, I remember my sister used one to get stuff for my nephew. She went back when he got a little bit bigger and they gave her larger clothes and a larger stroller. I really do wish I could help, I somewhat understand what a pain it is to carry a kid on the bus, as I seen my sister do it with her two kids and her husband (now ex-husband) refused to help her.



Thanks so much for the kind words Skywalker. Let's continue to support each other one day we won't be so poor and we'll be discussing which charity should get our extra funds. (I refuse to believe otherwise)
Good news is, I managed to score a cheap umbrella stroller and although it can't be used with the car seat, its still a working stroller.
So now I'm saving, applying everywhere I can and still waiting for the w-2. Its not ideal, but better than sitting around hoping for a miracle. I figure as long as you and I keep being productive we still have hope
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Itsa notame » Fri Sep 09, 2016 1:42 am

Well the best way would be to find an outcome where you get to do both.
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Philly » Fri Sep 09, 2016 1:58 am

In a perfect world yes
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Skywalker » Fri Sep 09, 2016 5:07 pm

Philly I agree, support. If you ever need a person to bitch to.. hit me up. I am always here to listen. I may not have children, but I have seen the struggles of my sister, who is currently raising her two by herself (I do what I can to help).

Hell, today I achieved one of my goals.. going back to school, so I can work in higher education. Figure if a museum or a local school will not hire me.. hello, community college. I also have the supplies needed to make some cool looking wreaths for a local high school (the one my niece attends) to sell to sports parents (they love to buy these things).

Keep your head up, remember that tomorrow will always be brighter, even if only by a little bit. Take and cherish the small wins, like having a push stroller, while not ideal, it is a start. That you have a plan for getting out of your current living situation, that is the best part, the goal and the plan to achieve that goal.

I know you can do it :) cause you are a Ninja and motherfuckin' Ninja never give up.
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Rivoc » Sat Sep 10, 2016 5:59 pm

Def take the high road. karma usually has a way of working things out before too long when someone is seriously wronging the good. i had a professor try to give me a 0 on a test when i had a doctors note and a 102 fever, AND he told me id be able to make it up in front of the whole class, logged a complaint in writing against him, and that started other people logging against him, and next semester on my way to my first class i saw him carrying boxes of stuff out to his car because he was fired. i smiled and looked at him and said "karma's a bitch, huh?" as I passed him by.

I have a few stories like this. Karma does tend to work its magic, eventually. Best of luck to you. id love to hear how things are going now as I realize this thread was made months ago.
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Philly » Sat Sep 10, 2016 7:17 pm

Good news: my raise finally came! I'm still struggling but I at least have that. So instead of complaining about all the other stuff I'm gonna focus on the raise today.
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Skywalker » Sat Sep 10, 2016 8:06 pm

W00t! W00t!

Nice, raises are always nice. Focus on the good :)

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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Philly » Sat Sep 10, 2016 8:38 pm

Thats the plan took the kids out, instead of focusing on drama and fighting ( got my ass beat again) now I just wanna focus on being happy
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby ink » Sat Sep 10, 2016 9:29 pm

Philly wrote:Good news: my raise finally came! I'm still struggling but I at least have that. So instead of complaining about all the other stuff I'm gonna focus on the raise today.

that is great! i know its hard to focus in the midst of a storm, but the anchoring to a positive is an excellent start. good thing is, hope is a very powerful tool. the resilience of the human spirit is a profound mystery...so within the midst of chaotic and overwhelming emotion, hope can begin to draw one out, eventually manifesting itself as progress! let that hope become the lighthouse in the storm and begin to lead you safely to shore, you got this!

"To live without Hope is to Cease to live."
~Fyodor Dostoevsky


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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby ghostdogg » Sat Sep 10, 2016 11:10 pm

righteous ... stay up Philly! what's meant to be, will be.
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Philly » Sun Sep 11, 2016 2:41 am

Thanks guys your words mean a kot
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Phara » Tue Sep 13, 2016 2:34 am

girl... here with you all the way <3
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby NaranjaRa » Tue Sep 13, 2016 3:09 am

Philly wrote:...now I just wanna focus on being happy


even when things are seeming down, they are indeed never hopeless and if you try to find something good to focus on in every situation it will always win in the end because no matter what happens *around* you, YOU are always in control of your own mindset

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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby cerrodepedro » Tue Sep 13, 2016 7:08 pm

Having your dwelling threatened SUCKS. I freaked out a couple of months ago about co parent going evil and deciding not to live with me and little one (opting to spend most of her time at the GF's and taking him along when I'm working and he's not at school) any more, but that is nothing compared to doing life under the circumstances you find yourself in: Shit job, MULTIPLE children, an outright hostile landlord, the major threat to health of everybody that is black mold, the kids' father being less involved (I'm intuiting that through some of the details here), etc., etc., etc. This is a set of fundamentally fucked up circumstances.

While acknowledging that I think all of us here like you better as a person having discovered that your imagination produces the idea of paying your slumlord in pennies, I second everybody else: Play the game, be mega compliant, document the hell out of everything (photos and video if possible), keep communication written so that it's never "landlord said this, I said that," but "okay here are the letters" or "here are the emails" or "here are the texts" or "here are the passive aggressive slips of paper."

I also wanna say you're doing a badass thing making it all work. You are carrying a large amount of stress and functioning while I presume that your brain is just cooking with anxiety. If we were nearby we'd cook you some freaking meals regularly and offer a big air mattress and our living room in the event of you being in between spots, child care, networking so you could meet some of my friends who are helpful as a support network in times like yours, and presuming that it wouldn't be a serious threat to your wellbeing (legally and employment speaking), as much of that of that lovely green medicine we like to keep around as you could benefit from.
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Re: Petty vs mature: what would you do?

Postby Philly » Wed Sep 14, 2016 2:25 pm

cerrodepedro wrote:Having your dwelling threatened SUCKS. I freaked out a couple of months ago about co parent going evil and deciding not to live with me and little one (opting to spend most of her time at the GF's and taking him along when I'm working and he's not at school) any more, but that is nothing compared to doing life under the circumstances you find yourself in: Shit job, MULTIPLE children, an outright hostile landlord, the major threat to health of everybody that is black mold, the kids' father being less involved (I'm intuiting that through some of the details here), etc., etc., etc. This is a set of fundamentally fucked up circumstances.

While acknowledging that I think all of us here like you better as a person having discovered that your imagination produces the idea of paying your slumlord in pennies, I second everybody else: Play the game, be mega compliant, document the hell out of everything (photos and video if possible), keep communication written so that it's never "landlord said this, I said that," but "okay here are the letters" or "here are the emails" or "here are the texts" or "here are the passive aggressive slips of paper."

I also wanna say you're doing a badass thing making it all work. You are carrying a large amount of stress and functioning while I presume that your brain is just cooking with anxiety. If we were nearby we'd cook you some freaking meals regularly and offer a big air mattress and our living room in the event of you being in between spots, child care, networking so you could meet some of my friends who are helpful as a support network in times like yours, and presuming that it wouldn't be a serious threat to your wellbeing (legally and employment speaking), as much of that of that lovely green medicine we like to keep around as you could benefit from.



Dude so much to respond to, so ur mostly spot on. My sons dad picked his speedball habit & disappeared but my daughter's dad stepped up he works days and I work evenings and we split the load as equally as possible. I've been compliant but the landlord has been a downright lunatic. Thanks for acknowledging that its a miracle I'm functioning because I don't know how I'm doing it. I appreciate your willingness to help and your words help more than you know. My phone is shut off until Friday when I get paid and making the necessary calls to fix this predicament has now gotten harder. I'm limited to free WiFi and for some reason WiFi calling doesn't work. I'm emailing everyone now. If anything, this experience has made me more resourceful and creative. I'm definitely gonna come out on top I just gotta work on the patience part of getting there.

And thanks again to all of you following my plight and giving kind words of encouragement. I need all the kind words you can spare
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