Phara's Salon

House of The Royal. Phara's Super Shiny Forum v3.0
User avatar
NaranjaRa
Nerd lvl: SUPA DUPA
Posts: 2493
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:53 am
Location: in the grove
Contact:

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby NaranjaRa » Wed Sep 28, 2016 12:49 am

i know this sounds like some grandma shit, but have you tried an epsom salt bath for your knee? pick out a kind with a nice scent like lavendar. you can literally feel it soaking in to your body and at the very least it leaves you pleasantly relaxed afterwards. but it does help the pain and ache as well. <3
User avatar
Phara
The Glue To This Bitch!
Posts: 2006
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:13 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Phara » Wed Sep 28, 2016 3:52 am

honestly i always thought that was something you did for your feet. if i can ever remember while at the supermarket, I'll pick some up. thanks babeh. (kiss)
Image
ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
Image

Image Image
User avatar
girlapaloo
MF'n LION-O RIDING A UNICORN
Posts: 912
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 2:53 pm

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby girlapaloo » Wed Sep 28, 2016 1:25 pm

NaranjaRa wrote:i know this sounds like some grandma shit, but have you tried an epsom salt bath for your knee? pick out a kind with a nice scent like lavendar. you can literally feel it soaking in to your body and at the very least it leaves you pleasantly relaxed afterwards. but it does help the pain and ache as well. <3


YAS. Epsom soaks are awesome.
My favorite thing we did over this summer was fill up the kiddie pool in the backyard and soak in epsom in the sun. (sun)
Very relaxing and healing!
9 Irresistable Reasons You Should Have an Epsom Salt Bath Today
Image
Image
Image
Spoiler: show
Image Image
User avatar
NaranjaRa
Nerd lvl: SUPA DUPA
Posts: 2493
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:53 am
Location: in the grove
Contact:

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby NaranjaRa » Thu Sep 29, 2016 4:37 am

that's an awesome link!! yes omg so much more than just for feet. i use a cane as it is (shutup) and one time while looking for apartments i basically walked so much i could not physically walk any longer my calves and knees just seized up. i had barely anything on me for pain as i was out of town from home. no vehicle, but there was a CVS a few blocks from the hotel i was staying at. took me close to an hour to wimper down to that pharmacy and find a bad of epsom salts. but after i soaked my legs for about 20mins...all of that soreness was magically gone. i honestly didn't want to leave that bath. when i did, i made it about 10 steps to the bed....i was so relaxed i just passed out! it was heaven and i am now a true believer!

also been reading a lot about magnesium deficiency so it makes even more sense. think i'll pick some up again. (sun)
User avatar
AliceElite
//wrestles darkness...WINS!
Posts: 607
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:54 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby AliceElite » Fri Sep 30, 2016 6:09 pm

I'm losing my job today. I am someone who puts 75% of my self worth into the fucking job I'm doing - into my employer's hands - and I'm getting booted today. They want to demote me to entry level. And my choices are leave OR take the insult.

I don't want to take the insult. I've struggled and worked and sacrificed for this FUCKING JOB and it's taken so much time and energy away from me, and now they're going to take my unemployment and my job and I feel utterly worthless. I want to crawl in a hole and die and I don't know how to stop crying. My body won't stop crying.

I've given everything to this job so I don't even have a support system to help me through this now because I don't fucking have any friends and I disappeared from the boards and I feel like all I'm good for is working at the fucking mall. I worked so hard for them. I worked so hard for them, you guys.

I'm sorry. I shouldn't even be here. I don't deserve to come in and vent to you guys when I'm so selfish. Phara just told me to and I didn't know what else to do.
Image
User avatar
Phara
The Glue To This Bitch!
Posts: 2006
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:13 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Phara » Fri Sep 30, 2016 6:16 pm

WHY THE FUCK SHOULDNT YOU BE IN HERE? THAT SHIT MADE ME ALMOST AS ANGRY AS YOUR SHIT JOB.

YOU ARE NINJA LEGEND AND NINJA THROUGH AND THROUGH AND YOU ARE STRUGGLING AND WE ARE ALWAYS HERE.

NEVER EVER THINK THAT THIS COMMUNITY WOULD TURN ITS BACK. WE ALL HAVE TO CURL UP AND CRY ONCE IN AN WHILE, QUEEN MORE THAN ANYONE. I'M HERE AND I'LL BE BACK FOR LESS CAPS LOCK IN 15.
Image
ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
Image

Image Image
User avatar
Philly
adept ninja
Posts: 557
Joined: Mon Mar 21, 2016 6:18 pm
Location: Philly

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Philly » Fri Sep 30, 2016 6:27 pm

Girl you're in the right place. We have you my cell is 215 526 8701. If you ever need to vent I'm here. I don't know how I can help just yet but if you tell me what you need I'll help in any way I can. We're your support system all across the world. I jumped as soon as I saw the link to this & I'll always jump for you guys. Just let the tears flow & then get back to being a badass. U have a team of strong bitches behind you. U can conquer this. I promise
Never apologize for being nerdy because non-nerdy people never apologize for being assholes - john barrowman
Image
User avatar
Phara
The Glue To This Bitch!
Posts: 2006
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:13 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Phara » Fri Sep 30, 2016 6:28 pm

AliceElite wrote:I'm losing my job today. I am someone who puts 75% of my self worth into the fucking job I'm doing - into my employer's hands - and I'm getting booted today. They want to demote me to entry level. And my choices are leave OR take the insult.

I don't want to take the insult. I've struggled and worked and sacrificed for this FUCKING JOB and it's taken so much time and energy away from me, and now they're going to take my unemployment and my job and I feel utterly worthless. I want to crawl in a hole and die and I don't know how to stop crying. My body won't stop crying.

I've given everything to this job so I don't even have a support system to help me through this now because I don't fucking have any friends and I disappeared from the boards and I feel like all I'm good for is working at the fucking mall. I worked so hard for them. I worked so hard for them, you guys.

I'm sorry. I shouldn't even be here. I don't deserve to come in and vent to you guys when I'm so selfish. Phara just told me to and I didn't know what else to do.

1. There are no felonies on your record.

2. you have me and candee and a few others as references, you need to add the magazine to your resume and print that shit out

3. your writing has always made you feel better... embrace it and put your hurt and rage into your poetry and your stories.

4. evolution main will be coming up soon and you should be an integral part of it considering your talent. whether that shit puts food on the table is irrelevant. it will help your soul which will help the new job search.

5. every single one of us, especially me, has this insane block with ninja where we think if we can't come in with a wall of text or something life changing.. it means we arent' doing enough and we don't deserve to be here. FUCK THAT. post in banter for the rest of your life for all i care. put down emojis for all i care. but show your presence. your fam is here and this is your home.

6. you are an incredible mother... but honestly lexi... you are an incredible activist... i just need you not to let this world steam roll you out of your beliefs. And that piece of shit job was just another non profit with an agenda for it. redirect your rage, redirect your desire for good, redirect your angst for change.

7. embrace perspective. Misery is arbitrary yes, and sometimes our own world can be choking... but... you have your health, your son, you ex is still all over your dick and a good father... you have fam that took you in physically when you were down (no matter how annoying they are) .... BREATHE BITCH.

YOU GOT THIS.
Image
ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
Image

Image Image
User avatar
girlapaloo
MF'n LION-O RIDING A UNICORN
Posts: 912
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 2:53 pm

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby girlapaloo » Fri Sep 30, 2016 6:29 pm

AliceElite wrote:I'm losing my job today. I am someone who puts 75% of my self worth into the fucking job I'm doing - into my employer's hands - and I'm getting booted today. They want to demote me to entry level. And my choices are leave OR take the insult.

I don't want to take the insult. I've struggled and worked and sacrificed for this FUCKING JOB and it's taken so much time and energy away from me, and now they're going to take my unemployment and my job and I feel utterly worthless. I want to crawl in a hole and die and I don't know how to stop crying. My body won't stop crying.

I've given everything to this job so I don't even have a support system to help me through this now because I don't fucking have any friends and I disappeared from the boards and I feel like all I'm good for is working at the fucking mall. I worked so hard for them. I worked so hard for them, you guys.

I'm sorry. I shouldn't even be here. I don't deserve to come in and vent to you guys when I'm so selfish. Phara just told me to and I didn't know what else to do.


:( I hate that you're feeling this way Alice. We're here for you. You have so much more value than just what you do for a paycheck.
Image
Image
Image
Spoiler: show
Image Image
User avatar
Phara
The Glue To This Bitch!
Posts: 2006
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:13 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Phara » Fri Sep 30, 2016 6:38 pm

i told the men no posting. that they were to give me a response and i'd post it for them.

from ink:

Lexi, your circumstance does not determine your character. time to rise above... use us all, for we are genuine. you know what your heart speaks... look forward, not behind. much <3 ~ ink
Image
ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
Image

Image Image
User avatar
Corgimom
3 hours later...
Posts: 1031
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:23 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Corgimom » Fri Sep 30, 2016 6:42 pm

Brass tacks- Last I heard you were couch surfing and living in the North West. I would never take the insult either but what do you need that we can do?
Image Image
Image
est 1953


Image
Nepherteri
grasshopper
Posts: 193
Joined: Tue Mar 22, 2016 2:54 am
Location: Dallas

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Nepherteri » Fri Sep 30, 2016 6:44 pm

Ok warning I will edit and add to this post several times...cause I'm Ninjaing at work...
So, I see two areas we can talk about...and unfortunately they don't always coexist harmoniously...Let's focus on Self-preservation with your current job and then we will talk about keeping your eyes open and pushing the next opportunity...
I like to say I'm a soldier of the start-over...I'll spare you the gory details of each crash and burn and rise from the ashes, but there are a few things I've learned that help me out when the going gets fucked up ugly...
1. When it FEELS like you are being forcibly ejected from your status quo...It is the Universe (feel free to insert whichever higher power you subscribe to here) begging, pleading, compelling, inexorably leading you to where you NEED to be. Usually kicking and screaming like a 2 yr old. Usually this is either for your own protection, or for your betterment...either way the transition usually isn't easy or pleasant...and then sometimes you go thru things for someone else...you are put in their path to be their guide...
2. It's easier to get a job when you HAVE a job already...seems counter intuitive but you will usually have a bit of leverage in the bargaining for your pay and benefits....so don't bail out yet...and be grateful it isn't 5 to 10 years ago when there were no jobs to GO TO...
3.Assess what you WANT to do...not what you HAVE to do...and work from there...what is your dream job...what qualities do you look for in an employer...who have you always wanted to work for? Start there...then look around you...whether you know it or not you have an enormous network of friends and associates...put some feelers out (Like you just did here)...and as long as you shake that tree of your network you'll start to see better apples of opportunity start to rain down your path...
4. Don't burn your bridges....as much as it may satisfy you right now it may bite you in the ass later...Keep your head up and leave like a queen not a jester...along with that remain humble...you never know who in that organization may have a token for you...and they ARE still part of your network
5. While in transition use it as a time to lean out your budget...make a list of what's most important...and what can wait and what's not necessary....so if in the transition you cash flow is tied up you take care of necessities only....remember this part isn't forever...
6. Make a plan for the worst if it were to happen...whatever you can conceive as the worst make a back up plan for that...have several...plan BCDFG....it will help you stay rational IF the storm does come and you won't do anything irrational or illegal just take it thru...
7.Love yourself through it all...take care of your emotional well being because it's going to take a bit of a beating...do what relaxes you...meditate spend some quiet time with yourself...it will bring you clarity and may show you the path very clearly...the God within you is waiting to guide you...listen
8.Be patient...nothing good happens over night...it has to slow marinate and slow cook...don't rush it...at the same time prepare your self to act...when stuff happens behind the scenes and opportunity knocks be prepared to move on it immediately
9.Smile it opens doors for you...a positive outlook is attractive to others and people will do things for you....swear it!! The one time I say don't follow Hana... resting bitch face scares people!!!
10. Be true to yourself...if you have done all of the above you are in a position to handle a demotion with grace and know in the end as you leave you will leave with your head up going to a better place with better opportunities...you know your sacrifices and that's all that matters...you know your worth and sell THAT to the next employer...
Love you...you got this...woman power...aruagh!!!!!
" Life is one big road with lots of signs. So when you're riding through the ruts, don't complicate your mind. Flee from hate, mischief and jealousy. Don't bury your thoughts, put your vision to reality. Wake up and live."~Bob Marley

ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
User avatar
Phara
The Glue To This Bitch!
Posts: 2006
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:13 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Phara » Fri Sep 30, 2016 6:51 pm

word nepherteri. i started to post on the self preservation issue but honestly... this job has been hellish for her for a while. but yes i agree 100%. Alice give us direction on which road you want to go down.
Image
ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
Image

Image Image
User avatar
Phara
The Glue To This Bitch!
Posts: 2006
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:13 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Phara » Fri Sep 30, 2016 6:59 pm

from zombie:

[2:58:32 PM] z0mbie: Can you tell her from me that i know 100% what she is feeling and to go with the shitty feelings for the moment because at a time like this, falling so far.. there will be a springboard at the bottom that will present itself to her and she will see the cracks of light on the way back up.. and when she has taken that time to settle with their decision will they show themselves and she can re-invent her life and construct herself to be the hero of her own movie
Image
ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
Image

Image Image
User avatar
Candeeoke
The Quiet Storm
Posts: 375
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:30 am
Location: aphantasia

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Candeeoke » Fri Sep 30, 2016 7:01 pm

OMG either I posted somewhere else, the forum ate my post...or I'm going nuts.

We've got you Alice. Money works itself out. I've walked away from jobs with nothing lined up. It will be okay. Tell us how to help.
ImageImage
User avatar
Lena
the unproven
Posts: 32
Joined: Mon Mar 28, 2016 11:42 am
Location: Woke, AF

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Lena » Fri Sep 30, 2016 7:03 pm

AliceElite wrote: I'm sorry. I shouldn't even be here. I don't deserve to come in and vent to you guys when I'm so selfish. Phara just told me to and I didn't know what else to do.


Girl. Please do not self-censor here. Of all places, not here. We - the collective woman that is - censor far too often. As you know there are so few spaces for us to express, unapologetically, so please please please know that this is PRECISELY the space for you to come and vent, cry, rage, etc. when you need it. I know you know this in your heart of hearts, but sometimes we need a reminder.

I'd like to share my favorite mantra >>> Rejection is Protection <<<

This mantra has helped with interpreting experiences that seem to be devastating on the surface and, instead, consider the ways that light and positivity are present. What I really mean here is, fuck that job. It could be that this is giving you the opportunity to pursue something better/more fulfilling. Or, this could be a chance to (re)consider how you dedicate your precious and finite energy.

Please know how loved you are here, even from lurkers like myself. I hope youre able to get on a path that is driven by your true passions and not the demands of others.

Totally here for you. Like, for real <3 Lena
User avatar
Phara
The Glue To This Bitch!
Posts: 2006
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:13 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Phara » Fri Sep 30, 2016 7:08 pm

^^ that made me tear up Lena.

//takes to heart
Image
ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
Image

Image Image
User avatar
Phara
The Glue To This Bitch!
Posts: 2006
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:13 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Phara » Fri Sep 30, 2016 7:09 pm

i assume alice is sobbing happy tears right now. i know how i feel about this all.

//smiles wryly

thank you ladies. keep the love for her coming. and the ideas.
Image
ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
Image

Image Image
User avatar
Phara
The Glue To This Bitch!
Posts: 2006
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:13 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Phara » Fri Sep 30, 2016 7:10 pm

from Feyd

Paul Hurtado Lexi, first off, don't ever think you don't belong in Ninja and aren't welcome to get whatever support you need from your fellow Ninjas there. More importantly, KNOW your self worth. You KNOW what you did, what you sacrificed. You KNOW that you're better and you deserve better than what they are giving you. Do what I did when I was in a similar situation. Tell them that YOU deserve your position, and if they don't allow you to keep what you've worked your ass off for, then tell them fuck off and get on the next great opportunity! Don't settle for less than you're worth! <3
Image
ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
Image

Image Image
Whisky_Tango_Foxtrot
yet remains in darkness..
Posts: 2
Joined: Mon Mar 21, 2016 7:31 pm
Location: Ann Arbor, MI
Contact:

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Whisky_Tango_Foxtrot » Fri Sep 30, 2016 7:18 pm

Girl. I have been there. I do not know what it's like to live in your particular shoes, but I know what it's like to give your everything to a faceless corporate retail demon and get nothing but grief and oppression back. Big corporations exist to feed their shareholders, not the people that are holding them up from within the trenches. This mentality is true everywhere, look at how the US treats their war veterans! From what I've experienced of life so far (I just turned 42 on Wed.) corporate retail views it's workers as more of a liability than an asset. YOU ARE NOT IN ANY WAY A LIABILITY. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL. YOU ARE WORTHY. If you can attempt to let that sink in, maybe you'll start to begin to understand that they truly do not deserve you.

I work in research at a state owned big ten university, and want you to also know that it's my University's policy to *always* deny inital unemployment claims, no matter the circumstances. I don't think this is very moral, but if your claim is denied PLEASE DO fight that. Speak to a lawyer if possible - some unemployment attornies do pro-bono work depending on the circumstances. If you worked, you paid into the system, and it's the system's job to take care of you now. The system actually owes you.

Deep within my heart I want to tell you that as some others are saying - don't fight those tears. They are coming anyhow....if you fight the tears you just hurt yourself....it costs so much more energy to fight it than just to let it out. Crying is your body's way of releasing.

I know what it feels like when you are screaming on the inside and out but nobody can even begin to hear you. But we hear you and we all love you. You are one of our own, and will never be alone now - a beautiful and precious asset to our Ninja Evolution.

You are worth it.
You are part of us.
You are Ninja.

Thank you Hana for poking me today - and getting me back on the boards. <3 <3 <3

Sincerely,
-CaRla-
gnarsky@gmail.com <-- hit me up any time

(PS: I am not in any way an expert, but I know about a lot about some weird random stuff - audio engineering, movie special effects, multimedia fine art, social research, data processing, jewelry making, glass blowing, clothing design, and I have a sturdy knowledge of a number of health issues including Ehlers' Danlos Syndrome, hypermobility, arthritis, autoimmune issues, thyroid issues, Irlen Syndrome, depression and anxiety. Anxiety is a big one. I was treated for over ten years for depression I did not have, because it was actually anxiety. I'm almost always available to talk about those things or anything else that may be on your mind, PM me for further contact details)
User avatar
AliceElite
//wrestles darkness...WINS!
Posts: 607
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:54 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby AliceElite » Fri Sep 30, 2016 7:39 pm

Oh my god I'm reading through all these right now - just had an hour long call with a (Really, honestly wonderful) coworker who has helped me get a lot of perspective from inside and ALL of your comments are SO ECHOING exactly what she said in different ways. I want to address them all but I just wanted to respond quick and say omfg you guys thank you so much. <3
Image
User avatar
Phara
The Glue To This Bitch!
Posts: 2006
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:13 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Phara » Fri Sep 30, 2016 7:39 pm

Image
Image
ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
Image

Image Image
ZhenyaB
yet remains in darkness..
Posts: 1
Joined: Sat Apr 30, 2016 9:50 pm
Location: Reading, UK

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby ZhenyaB » Fri Sep 30, 2016 7:40 pm

Hi every one, hi Alice. I'm a total rookie here, this is actually my first post, I was prompted by the Majesty herself to answer the SOS call. And yes, I see it is serious.
Alice. First of all, cry as much as you need to cleanse yourself of everything that soul sucking job was for and done to you. But not a tear more after that purpose is served. I don't know your story. But I have lived and worked in the States and although I was lucky to have a good employer it was painfully obvious to me how utterly unfair the rampant capitalism of American work place could be. It sounds you've devoted a lot of time - a lot of LIFE that belongs to YOU and only you to something that was not worth it. So cry for the time and the effort, but then get mad. Don't stay there, they have shown that they don't value you ( not because there is something wrong with you, but because something is wrong with them; when employer doesn't recognise the effort and dedication of their staff that employer won't truly succeed or prosper). Get mad - I am mad for you, just reading your post. Leave them, even if the alternative is working at a mall to sustain yourself at first, you cannot go back to the people who mistreated you that way, they will do it again and again if you stay. You know what you can do, you know what your passions are, you know for absolute certain that you can come and share the load on the forum without being ashamed or embarrassed of your hurt, you know YOUR worth. Don't make them let you think less of yourself because THEY are being assholes. In the long run, it's absolutely not worth it. I send you much love and support, I know I'm a total stranger, but in the great scope of things none of us truly strangers, and my wishes for the speedy recovery of your spirit and dignity are absolutely genuine. So to sum it up, FUCK THEM, you can and WILL do so much better ( but try to restore yourself first, back stabbing takes a lot out of a soul :( )
User avatar
Phara
The Glue To This Bitch!
Posts: 2006
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:13 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Phara » Fri Sep 30, 2016 7:41 pm

CARLA... I'm screen shotting what has become your first post on ninja as the epitome of what one does upon stumbling into this world. that made me so happy.

AliceElite wrote:Oh my god I'm reading through all these right now - just had an hour long call with a (Really, honestly wonderful) coworker who has helped me get a lot of perspective from inside and ALL of your comments are SO ECHOING exactly what she said in different ways. I want to address them all but I just wanted to respond quick and say omfg you guys thank you so much. <3


<3 we are here. this outlet is yours as much as it is mine.
Image
ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
Image

Image Image
User avatar
Phara
The Glue To This Bitch!
Posts: 2006
Joined: Fri Mar 18, 2016 1:13 am

Re: Phara's Salon

Postby Phara » Fri Sep 30, 2016 7:43 pm

and now i'm sobbing. LADIES... and gentlemen...

there are no words for what you've put down for both me and Alice today. <3 (phara)
Image
ImageImage
ImageImage
ImageImage
Image

Image Image

Return to “Phara's Phorum”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 7 guests